a search through 4,285,199,774 pages and still no luck...

This is as close as I can get to confirming the Spike Jonze story.

"An unfortunate amount of what you are about to read is true. It used to be a lot of fun to interview Spike Jonze because he would just make up stuff, but this time he doesn't utter a single lie for me. In the past he has pretended to be his own assistant, canceling an interview with a reporter over and over again; he has acted like a Corvette-driving loudmouth for the BBC; he has staged a fight in a fast-food restaurant for Spin magazine; he has refused to admit he was the intentionally bad choreographer in his Fatboy Slim Praise You video. He used to care. But now Jonze, 33, is all sweet and..."

The article was from the November 1999 issue of Spin. Tori Amos was on the cover. I need that article.

Isn't it kind of ironic that extra gum doesn't have sugar in it? What makes it extra good?

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After trying to get K.F to like me for so long I finally gave it up. After about 2 months of moping and listening to lots of radiohead, I decided I needed to go on a date to clear my head of her. I worked at Subway. We were located right next to a Domino's pizza and often bartered food with each other. Free cokes for them, and a pizza for us once in a while. Despite the domino's girls drinking lots of coke, they were all really attractive. One day I got the phone number of one of them and asked her out.

I was 16 at the time and had not very good dating experiences. Most of them were movie dates. So for our first date I figured we would do the movie thing.... I'm tired.

CONTINUED...

To make a long story short... I ended up in that girl's bedroom watching MTV. About 10 or 15 minutes after we went up there her family got home. I thanked God I got out of there with my chastity in tact.